This is a Big Deal

Without comment or graphic:

A large penis is the best defense

I could not help myself from posting a link to this story from the Toronto Sun, about a 21-year-old engineering student who is denying charges that he sexually assaulted a friend who spent the night with him in February 2004, claiming that his penis is just too big for such an act.

A urologist has shown the court a plastic model of a penis that supposedly approximates that of the defendant, Mischa Beutling. Beutling is 6-foot-7 and 240 pounds. His repli-cock, designed to simulate a semi-relaxed state, measured eight and a half inches in length by six and a half inches in girth. Yes. Girth.

Earlier in the trial, the same urologist had testified that Buetling's penis is in the top 5 percent size-wise among his patients. Really? Who's in the top 1 percent?

Buetling's defense rests on the urologist's testimony that a woman who has not given birth would have trouble having intercourse with a man whose penis was that big were she not sexually stimulated first. (Broadsheet aside: The fact that a woman is sexually aroused does not mean that it is OK to have sex with her against her will.)

The [crown's attorney], Bhavna Bhangu, has dismissed the defendant's "size theory," claiming that he has not measured himself and that her client did not get a chance to respond [badda boom] to claims about his breadth and heft while on the witness stand.

A verdict in the case is expected next month.